Amid the news this week that Australian TV show Neighbours will broadcast Australian TV's first same-sex marriage between actors David Tanaka and Aaron Brennan, with gay icon Magda Szubanski as celebrant, much of the discussion in Celebrant-circles has been about how Magda is dressed and the image she presents of a celebrant. Comments by celebrants have ranged from "appalling" and "atrocious" to (my favourite) "Good Lordy Lordy!" (Anyone familiar with Magda's role as Chenille on Fast Forward will recognise that line). It seems that a lot of celebrants are concerned about the image it presents of the profession of authorised marriage celebrant.
But is raises a good question: how do couples like their celebrant to look at the wedding? I don't leave anything to guesswork as I always ask at a pre-wedding meeting "how would you like me to dress?" I get a range of answers, typically beginning with "wear whatever you like". Generally, most couples like me to wear a suit and tie, even at casual weddings, as it presents an image of dignity, or authority. But I have also been asked to wear jeans, casual shirt and thongs! (That one time I was asked, by the groom, to wear thongs, his bride-to-be turned to him and said "He's not wearing thongs ... and neither are you!" It was, however, a lovely casual wedding and I wore a smart casual shirt and dress jeans, as did the groom.)
But the appearance of the celebrant is important, and should be discussed beforehand. I've heard of a celebrant who always wears white to weddings (what is she thinking?!), and you certainly don't want a celebrant thinking they're the star of the show. It's your day and you are the stars, so you might want to let your celebrant know what your expectations are. If you choose me to be your celebrant I'll be asking you the question so you won't need to worry about any unexpected surprises on the day. Actually, I'm thinking of getting a suit tailored to match Magda's!
But is raises a good question: how do couples like their celebrant to look at the wedding? I don't leave anything to guesswork as I always ask at a pre-wedding meeting "how would you like me to dress?" I get a range of answers, typically beginning with "wear whatever you like". Generally, most couples like me to wear a suit and tie, even at casual weddings, as it presents an image of dignity, or authority. But I have also been asked to wear jeans, casual shirt and thongs! (That one time I was asked, by the groom, to wear thongs, his bride-to-be turned to him and said "He's not wearing thongs ... and neither are you!" It was, however, a lovely casual wedding and I wore a smart casual shirt and dress jeans, as did the groom.)
But the appearance of the celebrant is important, and should be discussed beforehand. I've heard of a celebrant who always wears white to weddings (what is she thinking?!), and you certainly don't want a celebrant thinking they're the star of the show. It's your day and you are the stars, so you might want to let your celebrant know what your expectations are. If you choose me to be your celebrant I'll be asking you the question so you won't need to worry about any unexpected surprises on the day. Actually, I'm thinking of getting a suit tailored to match Magda's!
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